"I don't make hell for nobody. I'm only the instrument of a laughing providence. Sometimes I don't like it myself, but I couldn't help it if I was born smart."

1st Sgt. Milton Anthony Warden.
"From here to Eternity"

Paul Valery

"You are in love with intelligence, until it frightens you. For your ideas are terrifying and your hearts are faint. Your acts of pity and cruelty are absurd, committed with no calm, as if they were irresistible. Finally, you fear blood more and more. Blood and time."

The Wisdom of the Ages

"When a young man, I read somewhere the following: God the Almighty said, 'All that is too complex is unnecessary, and it is simple that is needed',"

Mikhail Kalashnikov

Ya ever seen my house?

Ya ever seen my house?
Neither have I Ted! You douchebag.
"Here lies the bravest soldier I've seen since my mirror got grease on it."

Zapp Brannigan

Wednesday, December 09, 2009

Hey Ho, Let's Go...

Life has been too weird of late for any kind of coherence but I've been liking The Ramones lately so my bullshit will be broken by a couple of cultural interludes.
Back in the day, had I heard of The Ramones, I would have been seriously uninterested/appalled. I was more of a Jethro Tull concept rock kind of guy. I got better although I still like JT.
Now some more of that good, American Music.

Been gone a looong time.
God how I hate holidays.
Wall-to-wall, insane relatives, all that stuff.
Got in some seriously good "self-reliance creds" however.
On the return from my final, firewood adventure the old pick-em-up died.
Nothing serious - or even unexpected. The charging system has been sporadic of late so I knew there was a generator or regulator in my future anyway.
The magic moment came as we entered town. Around sixish, dark at what passes for rush-hour here in the woods.
I was being immediately followed by a good Samaritan who pulled up alongside - the first car to pass - and asked if he could pull us somewhere.
So, free tow home. Not bad.
Over course of the five or six mile trip the chain came unhooked several times.
I'd just thrown it over the axle since I wasn't exactly full of ideas in the heat of the moment. A spring shackle would have been better.
Anyway, the final reattachment of the chain, within a mile of home, included the tie-rod as well - thanks to your always quick-thinking author.
One of the many dire warning intoned to me by the Father Figure as a youth was this: never ever put a tow chain around your tie-rod.
Okay, bent tie-rod.
"For the thing which I greatly feared is come upon me, and that which I was afraid of is come unto me."
Job 3:25
Here's the payoff though.
I don't drive old shitboxes because I can't afford any better. I can't - but that's not the reason - well, not the only reason. Situations like this one are.
I pulled the generator and took it to a shop to be tested. It was charging fine but the bearings were a little crunchy so I left it in their care.
A new regulator - Carquest $29.95 (I had to wait overnight). The generator rebuild; $55.
Here's the beauty part. In a panic over my tie-rod, I Googled (The wonders of technology!) the malady. Seems the off-road nuts deal with this all the time so I picked up a little realistic perspective from one of their fora.
So, I waited for a nice time of day, took apart one tie-rod end and unscrewed the rod from the other. Then - and here's where it gets complicated - I took it back to the anvil and hammered it straight.
The whole job - less than a hour, fifteen minutes of which were spent looking for a part I'd dropped - and no money.
I know, this is supposed to be dangerous and stupid but this rig won't even go over sixty - or corner hard enough to put any appreciable strain on the rod.
So I'm a thrill seeker.
I did take the precaution of canceling my entry in next June's 24 Hours of Le Mans.
Just to play it safe.




Chewing out a rhythm on my bubble gum
The sun is out and I want some.
Its not hard, not far to reach
We can hitch a ride
To rockaway beach.
Up on the roof, out on the street
Down in the playground the hot concrete
Bus ride is too slow
They blast out the disco on the radio
Rock rock rockaway beach
Rock rock rockaway beach
We can hitch a ride
To rockaway beach
Its not hard, not far to reach
We can hitch a ride
To rockaway beach.


You kids get to bed now.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Enjoy----

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZWhzWQsbROc

Happy Holidays -S-

Bob Brock said...

S,
Thanks for that!
Country done right, yo.

Assrot said...

The Ramones suck. Always have. Always will. They aren't worth the sweat on a Jethro Tull member's ass crack.

Sorry but someone had to say it.

Merry Christmas.

Joe

Bob Brock said...

Yeah, they're not for everyone.
Are you sure you understand the music, Joe?
Kidding.
I love them because, other than The Trogs or The Trashmen, they are the kings of the three-chord tune.
It's a fuck-you-version of Buddy Holly et al - and there's virtually no one who can't be put ill at ease by The Ramones played at the appropriate volume.
And besides, I thought "I'm Against It" was inspired - not just the song but my choice of it for the Elephant People.
Sadly, you are right about one thing.
If, as in your view, they've always sucked, then they likely will through eternity.
3/4 of them are dead.
Johnny and Joey from just garden variety cancers.
Dee Dee was the only one to have fallen prey to the dissolute lifestyle. Smack overdose I think.
Okay, new topic - question:
Best Jethro Tull album?
There is only one right answer - Benefit.
You have a nice Christmas as well my charming Assrot.

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