"I don't make hell for nobody. I'm only the instrument of a laughing providence. Sometimes I don't like it myself, but I couldn't help it if I was born smart."

1st Sgt. Milton Anthony Warden.
"From here to Eternity"

Paul Valery

"You are in love with intelligence, until it frightens you. For your ideas are terrifying and your hearts are faint. Your acts of pity and cruelty are absurd, committed with no calm, as if they were irresistible. Finally, you fear blood more and more. Blood and time."

The Wisdom of the Ages

"When a young man, I read somewhere the following: God the Almighty said, 'All that is too complex is unnecessary, and it is simple that is needed',"

Mikhail Kalashnikov

Ya ever seen my house?

Ya ever seen my house?
Neither have I Ted! You douchebag.
"Here lies the bravest soldier I've seen since my mirror got grease on it."

Zapp Brannigan

Monday, November 11, 2013

Somebody's Got a Birthday!



One hundred and forty years old today but I'll bet the old guy still remembers the present he got for his forty-fifth.
He is said to have gushed over the shiny new Armistice and, oddly unfamiliar, peace he'd received as: "Not a bad birthday present".
Pretty classy given that he had to share his present with everyone else in the world.
I briefly mentioned Sgt. Maj. Daniel J. Daly way back here during our discussion of the Mack AC.
Just to cover that ground quickly: He won two Medals of Honor along with only eighteen other service members in all of history.
You can check out his fruit salad below. Distinguished Service Cross, Navy Cross... two bronze stars on his Good Conduct Medal. They guy was a marvel.
China Relief Expedition Medal, Philippine Campaign Medal, Expeditionary Medal with one bronze star, Mexican Service Medal, Haitian Service Medal, WW1 Victory Medal with Citation Star and three upscale, French awards for gallantry.

All that having been said... what's with the hat? Looks gay - and French.
You may recall the recent nontroversy concerning the USMC's  blue-skying some ideas re new uniform hats - covers in gruntspeak.
The venerable New York Post broke the story on the 23th of last month. Lots of good fun in the comments section there. Apparently, the President is trying to make all the Marines look more unisex - for some reason. The conjecture seems to be that Obama, as an insecure, pretender-to-the-throne, finds the Jarheads too intimidating and needs to feminize them a bit so he doesn't get scared while one of them holds his umbrella (That really gravels 'em, the umbrella thing. They didn't even start watching the President until we got a black one).
The Madogre and his Dad both got in on this with solemn, ponderous pronouncements that the Marines would never stand for this, that his was further evidence in the case of Obama vs Everything Macho and Bacon.
Two days later, the Post printed their retraction/clarification but by then the story had been outed by Stars and Stripes and Business Insider as well as others but by then the seed had been planted.
What was the origin of this tantrum-in-a-teapot? The Uniform Board was thinking about switching to a universal cover as the women's hat was no longer being manufactured and a new design was needed for it in any case. They asked for comments from the rank and file with the result being that everyone's mighty panties were wound into nice tight bunches.
The observation that the new lid would make the Marines look more wussy and effeminate was lost on me although, in the illustration above the two inboard Marines do look a bit girly.
Our enemies will see us as weak if our dress uni's don't strike terror 'cause that's what armed conflict is you know: It's a fashion show.
Personally, I like the Daly hat but I don't really give a shit one way or the other. The universe put down any preconceptions I may have had regarding uniforms forty years ago when the USN decided to chuck the old Donald Duck suit in favor one resembling the Good Humor Man's. Get over it.
In BDU's everyone looks like a walking pile of androgynous laundry anyway.
In closing, let me simply state, as emphatically as I can, that:
French-bashing is the surest way to expose your ignorance of history to anyone outside of your own bubble.
The image of the "Cheese-eatin'- surrender-monkey" came from the fertile mind of Groundskeeper Willie in 1995 and was later popularized by that poster-boy of callow nepotism and smug, smarmy ignorance, Jonah Goldberg while he was selling Bush's Debacle in Iraq-el.
You may recall him as that nice Jewish boy who brought to light the Monica Lewinsky story. He's a fool.
Remember that war, the one girlie-man Msgt Daly participated in?
For the first two years of that, 80% of the line in the West was held by the French alone and they still held half after that. On that front, virtually the entire ground war was fought on French territory.
I'll begin my gentle program of reeducation by directing the reader to this treatise from Cracked.com:
"The Five Most Full of Shit National Stereotypes". I know, it's from a humor magazine. I'm spoon-feeding for those whose history comes from "The Simpsons" or Jonah G.
I'm random and rambling and neglecting the Birthday Boy.
Happy hundred-and-fortieth, Old Timer. Don't let the pussies make fun of your hat.
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