Happy Armistice Day! "MURICA!" Edition

All good wishes for the 99th anniversary of the cessation of hostilities in the most devastating war to date - to be later surpassed by chapter two.
We call it "Veteran's Day".

Truth be told, 'MURICA! has had a tough time with its wars since WW2.
Korea ended up a draw - and besides, it was a UN thing.
Viet Nam is something we just don't talk about.
We had that expensive bit of theater where George the Smart(er) showed that nobody can boss around our wealthy, spoiled "ally". Not when we've got eight years worth of built-up... stimulus spending!
We won that one but ever since we just haven't been able to hit our groove. Of course we may just turn the whole Afghanistan thing into a done deal once the Cheeto Supreme hits his stride.
Thing is: It's been a long time and it is called "the graveyard of empires."
Here's what I hope is an instructive tale regarding our past glory and the hope of reclaiming it.

"This interesting picture, taken in 1918, shows employees of the New York Central Railroad at a celebration in Victory Way, showing off a pyramid of recovered German helmets in front of Grand Central Terminal. There were over 12,000 German Pickelhaubes on the pyramid, sent from warehouses in Germany at the end of the war."

What they were reporting actually was comprised of two pyramids of Pickelhauben, 12,000 each - situated at either end of Park Avenue. All to commemorate our glorious triumph over the dreaded Hun and to help give a hearty "well-done!" to France and Great Britain. Armistice - a capital idea!
The primary aim of this ostentatious display was to sell bonds to pay back the war loan. Our government used to do things like that - pay back war loans.
However, this is a Trump of level tackiness and presumptuous in the extreme. But they did acknowledge that the "captured helmets" had come from warehouses in the home of our so-soundly-trounced foe.

Pictured: A 1917 recruiting poster using all the "Poor Little Belgium" propaganda material that had been so effective three-years earlier.
Old imagery. In the new and improved war, the Germans had little chance to ravish virgins since they were now stuck living in the mud - just like everyone else.
Notice what the large, anti-social gorilla is rocking for head-gear while he menaces us with his cultur club.
Timeline adjustment is needed.
Well before the half-way point of the war, the pickelhaube went the way of the blue and red outfits that the French had worn.

Jonah Goldberg calls you guys "Surrender Monkeys"

"Lafayette, we are here!"

'Member that? Black Jack Pershing said that! 

No, he didn't. Follow the link.

Pershing showed up with... whoever a hundred years ago last April - which explains  the near-orgasmic excitement surrounding our participation in "Keeping the world safe for democracy" among the historically ignorant and inveterate believers in "'MURICA!"

The exhausted Allies had a different vision. They'd wanted American troops to be simply larded into French or Uk troops to be able to quickly exploit the fact that Germany was exhausted - and get the fucking war finished.

But Pershing decided that we needed to build our Army from the ground up.  Eleven months  passed but we finally got our shit consolidated.

The first significant  US action was a 120-man raid conducted March 9, 1918. In reality it was pretty much a test drive for the newbies.

It was led by that grandstanding Bozo, Douglas MacArthur, West Point class of '02, who, with the rank of full colonel, led the raid wearing a soft cap, his West Point sweater and riding breeches - carrying a riding crop. What an asshole.

So yeah. We came. We saw. We took a looooong time getting ready but we kicked ass.

Check out those 24,000 helmets!

So, advice to Donny the Dim: The key tot US victories, at least in the past century, has depended on joining a war "already in progress." Ideally, you make lots of money rocking your profiteering thing ahead of time and then - pounce!